I pity each one of them
Hard Year for College Presidents Ending (Yahoo!, AP)
Yeah, you know, with foie gras possibly being banned and all.
Seriously, what the holy hell fuck? Is there a point to this article? Is this any sort of news that belongs outside of a trade publication for higher education? Do we really give a shit about these silver-spoony bastards who eat off rose petals and shit in gold toilets? Have you ever seen what a college president’s house looks like? Jesus H. Christ, it’s like fucking Dynasty all up in that shit! These assholes are RICH RICH RICH!
And for what? Basically, their only job is to keep the endowment rolling, and to not piss off either the tenured professors or alumni. I bet a mail clerk has a harder job than that. Lawrence Summers failed miserably at those lonely goals, and got shitcanned. NO FUCKING SURPRISE.
Then again, it’s been a tough year for college lacrosse players too. One simple rule: hands off the stripper. They seemingly couldn’t follow it. Not-at-all-funny shitstorm ensues. Question: I thought if you were an athlete, you could get ass on your own, right? Even these guys have to pay for sex in college now? They’re supposed to be the alpha males. Pathetic! Do not pass go, do not collect $200, dickwads!
Lesson of the day: forget college. Much trouble for nothing. Trade school is where it’s at. Go DeVry, motherfuckers.